Today I realized that I have forgotten what normal feels like. Almost 13 years ago God blessed us with the very special gift of our son, Sweet G. He is a gift that I feel like God miraculously handed down from heaven and placed in our lives. It's a fairy tale story of a family of three wishing to become a family of four and who suddenly in the twinkling of an eye have their dream handed to them. If you have never read the story of G's adoption you should. It is a wonderful story of God's love and grace.
I feel like I have raised two only children. T was an only child for almost 12 years before Sweet G came along and Sweet G became an only child of sorts when T left for college 6 years ago. They are as different as daylight and dark in many ways. One strong willed and stubborn, one calm and happy go lucky, but both very much adored by their Mom.
With T we played hide and seek, chase, built forts, climbed trees and hiked through the woods. G has never done one of those things. G and I watch videos, sing karaoke, research assassinated presidents, and play trivia games on the iPad. T was a typically developed child and G has Cerebral Palsy, learning disabilities and developmental delays. We have spent time with therapists in and out of our lives, worked on standing, walking, and dressing skills instead of going to the park, playing and doing all the things kids do.
Life with G is just different. There are so many things he can do and we have adapted our lives in such a way that I honestly forget what all he misses out on until some random thing comes up out of the blue and reminds me that we aren't living a normal life! It has simply become normal for us.
Today was one of those surprising days that slipped up on me and took my breath away. We arrived home from church to find the children across the street raking up a huge pile of leaves in their front yard so they could jump in it. Such a normal childhood thing to do. My very busy hubby offered to pay the kids to rake our front yard. The kids were so excited! By the way, the sweetest kids in the world live across the street from me! : ) They offered to do it for free (I told you they are perfect kids)...but my husband insisted on paying them. So the three of them hop over to our house and what they were doing for fun has become a way to make money.
Sweet G could hear them outside laughing and talking as they happily raked our yard and he asked if he could go outside with them. I thought it was a great opportunity for him to spend time with his peers so we rolled him outside and gave him a small rake I use in my flower bed. He loved being able to help and made the comment when we came inside, "I didn't know a handicapped kid could rake leaves!"
Wow...that statement took me by surprise and made me realize we are not normal! We don't do what typical families do. We somehow manage to forget that fact in the busyness of living "our normal" of stretching, massaging, dressing, toileting, making his bed, cutting his food, helping him do...everything. We have let our child learn helplessness and that is something we are now working on overcoming.
Tomorrow we will oil, massage, stretch, dress, toilet, bathe, and help in so many ways but today for just a little while I had a glimpse of normal and it sure was wonderful.
